Women & Children First by Gill Paul ~ Book Review

Reg Parsons is 21 years old and has secured a job on the Titanic as a first class steward.  He's worked on other ships before but with this position he's hoping to save enough to start a business of his own.  Juliette Mason-Parker is travelling in first class with her mother who is determined to find Juliette a rich husband and have her married off before her pregnancy becomes obvious and their reputations are ruined.  Annie McGowan's husband went to America 18 months ago to find a job and now her and their four children are aboard the Titanic in 3rd class excited to see Seamus once again and start a new life.  But when the Titanic sinks not only are their dreams in shatters now they must navigate the uncertainty, the PTSD and the guilt of having survived the horrific event.  Coming to terms with what they saw will not be easy, moving on even harder and each handles it in their own way.  Will they ever stop hearing the cries of those that died around them while they made it alive?

Titanic is a buzzword for me in stories and this one took a different perspective than those I've read before.  Most of the stories basically stopped when the rescue ship Carpathia arrives,  but this story mostly dealt with how these 3 survivors tried to carry on their lives as survivors while so many didn't make it.  The first part of the story lays the background of their lives and the reasons they were sailing on the ship and the second deals with how they tried to rebuild.  It was a very interesting perspective.  Most of the story is told through the perspective of Reg the first class steward but the main characters lives all intersect and  connect both on the ship and afterward.  The story was gripping and the description of the sinking, though I've read other Titanic stories, still kept me on the edge of my seat.  Character development was good and it was interesting to read, in spite of it being fictional, some of the decisions of the characters that were made post survival.  While it's easy to sit in judgment of them seeing it as horrible decisions from our viewpoint, it made me think of actual survivors and how they would have had to make split second decisions just having passed through the immense trauma that they did, arriving in a place they didn't know, with literally nothing, possibly filled with regrets at what they might have done or didn't do during the disaster.  The book also explored a bit of the spiritualism that was popular in America at the time of the sinking as some survivors desperately consulted mediums to try and connect with loved ones they had lost.  It doesn't dwell on it but neither does it shirk from that part of the Titanic survivors history.  I found the story drew me right into the lives of these characters. 

I rated it a 9.5/10

Welcome to Friday's Fave Fives.  I'm keeping my tulip button up this week in a determined effort to believe spring is just around the corner.  We had a snow dump yesterday morning and another is expected over the weekend starting this afternoon.  We had such a dry winter that I'm going to choose to be thankful for the moisture.  Eventually in it's own good time spring will be here.  But until then let's look back over the week and find what blessed us and share five of our favorites.

~ weekend movie afternoons ~ Hubby and I have an extensive blu-ray collection that has built up over the years.  This year we determined to watch one of them a weekend and make a decision whether its a favorite and something we will watch over and over again and therefore a keeper or whether we feel we're good to say goodbye to it. It's been kind of fun looking forward to the shared time and it feels good to free up space 

~ vanilla slice treat ~ Hubby had to make a delivery in a little town that has a good Dutch bakery and he stopped in and picked me up one of my favorite pastries.  Vanilla slices remind me of my childhood when Mom and Dad would treat us with one occasionally.  It was very thoughtful of him and I enjoyed every bite.  

~ surprise mail ~ Yesterday I opened the mailbox to find this cute envelope in there addressed to me. (Of course I scratched off the personal info on it,)

 Upon opening it,  I found the most lovely watercolor painting of a book and flowers, 2 of my favorite things.  My friend painted me a picture to let me know she was thinking of me.  What a blessing that was on the tail end of a tough month.  She had no idea I'd been sick or injured my knee, yet at just the perfect timing she sent me this.  The envelope already had me smiling but the painting and note was a real gift.  I'm going to frame it for my bookshelves.  Isn't she talented?  And she only started painting last fall.  

~ time change ~ Ok I am going to be quite frank, I hate the time change, whether springing ahead or falling back.  My body just does not handle it well.  But I am thankful for more daylight at the end of the day.  I just wish they would quit messing with nature the way God created it and let my circadian rhythm stay the in the same groove throughout the year.  

~ a return to neighborhood walks ~ my knee has healed enough that I have been able to get out some days after work to take Tux for short walks around the neighborhood.  Sometimes it's only around a block or two before the knee starts getting fatigued or sore but yesterday I was able to go over a mile.  Not briskly, but a nice slower yet steady pace.  So thankful to be able to be out doing that again.  

What have been your favorite blessings this week?

Friday's Fave Five #879

Welcome to Friday's Fave Five.  This is our place to pause and be thankful for the blessings in our past week.  Our lives can be so busy with things pulling us in all directions that it is so easy to not even notice blessings that come our way much less take the time to thank God for them.  On Friday's this is our time to, even for a few minutes, push that pause button and intentionally both notice and give thanks.  Please join us as we share five of our favorites from the week.

~ words of encouragement ~ words are so important and I am thankful I had several encouraging ones this past week.  From friends God used to text or call or comments left on posts, I have felt lifted up and want to say thank you.  Sometimes all we need is a few cheerleaders in our lives once in awhile to get back on track.

~ doctor's appointment ~ I finally bit the bullet and made a doctor appointment to figure out what is going on with my knee.  It's been a month and I thought by now it would have been all better but it is still acting up.  Well, turns out my doc thinks I ripped my cartilage.  So off to a knee clinic I go to get their opinion and recommendations.  It's a relief to know what is causing the weird and sometimes painful symptoms.  So now we'll see what the knee clinic recommends.  May be some exercises, maybe a brace till it heals fully or may be nothing at all.  We'll find out.  Thankful for a doctor who is on top of it.

~ signs of spring ~ from the warmth of the sun when it shows up, to the birdsong, to the snow melted away, to the beginnings of some green grass poking through the brown in some areas, yes even some of the crazy winds, all are signaling a change in seasons.  Oh I know, being southern Alberta we'll probably see another dump of snow or two, but it a different kind of snow than what we get in the midst of winter.  And what really signals spring?  The dreaded time change this weekend where we lose an hour.  But, hey, it's all announcing warmer and longer days are coming!

~ big hugs from little arms ~ for some reason some of the little ones in dayhome have been extra generous with their hugs this week.  I'll take them anytime they want to give them!

~ good laughs ~ this week there has been a few moments of real good laughter whether between me and Hubby or the dayhome kids or my sister or friends.  What a gift laughter and joy are.  Thankful I have these wonderful moments.

What are you most thankful for this week?

Letting Go

Full disclosure here.  I think I'm burned out a bit.  As I sit and look at my blog, I am sad about the utter lack of content other than Friday's Fave Five posts.  At least last year I also had book reviews.  And way back when I used to write a lot.  But this year, I feel like I've so far hit a wall.  I don't know what it is.  Delayed grief and exhaustion from the last 3 years probably has something to do with it.  Tired of working a 50 hour work week is a lot of it.  I've been chatting with my consultant from the agency trying to figure out a way to go part time in this job of childcare but the options are very, very limited.  I can go down in the number of kids which is nice but I would still be working the same hours and for less money.  I could try and change my program from a 5 day a week to maybe a 4 day or 3 day a week. But that has it's own issues especially with the childcare saturation climate that is in my city right now.  In a knee jerk response to not enough child care spaces, government has licensed way too many new daycares to open and now the ratio is out of balance the other way where now we are competing to fill our empty spaces and cutting back on open days might put me at a disadvantage.  The constant trying to think it through has, frankly, been exhausting.  That is how my mind works. It just keeps replaying everything trying to find options I haven't thought of.  

If I pause, though, my spirit whispers another story.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

Lean not on your own understanding,

In all your ways acknowledge Him

and He shall direct your paths"

Provers 3: 5-6

So much wrapped up in those 4 short sentences.  It asks me to trust in the One who has been faithful in the past and will be in the moment.  To let go of relying on myself.  That is a hard one for me coming from a background of "God helps those who help themselves".  But instead of striving to help myself, God is calling me to simply acknowledge Him in this crossroads, ask Him because He knows so much more, because He has a plan.  And if I do that, the beauty is He will be directing me and placing things together that I might not even understand right now.  It's His timing, not mine.  And when it comes right down to it, no matter how I slice and dice it, it's going to be a step of faith.  Because that is what He wants to grow in me.  If faith is never tested, how do I really even know if I actually trust God?  It's easy to verbally say I have faith in the good times, but if it's never put on the line,  do I really?  Jesus never said life would be easy, but He promised He would always be there and never leave me or forsake me.  Do I really believe that?  I'm working on it.  And I've come to the conclusion that in this lifetime, I will never have arrived.  It is a step by step, day by day growing of my faith and trust in the One who holds me in the palm of His very capable hand.  

Friday's Fave Five #878

 

Welcome to Friday's Fave Five.  Looking for our favorite blessings from the last week and not forgetting to be grateful to God for them.  I will be joining in with my own post later today.  I, unfortunately. was hit with being really sick this week and just didn't have the energy left after work to put a thoughtful post together, but go ahead and link on and I'll join you as soon as I can today.  

Whew, finally was able to make it on here.  It's been a week.  I had to take 2 sick days and probably should have taken a third.  If you know me, you know I never take sick days.  In fact, the last one was when I had doctor diagnosed flu about 7 years ago.  But in spite of the tough week there were glimpses of God's goodness throughout and I want to be thankful and celebrate those.

~ first aid recertification done ~  done for another 3 years.  I was quite anxious for this, but though the day was long, 6 hours, and exhausting, doing CPR is no joke, I came away feeling quite confident with the skills.  This is a requirement for work and was due by the end of February so I could not miss this even though I was starting to sense I might be coming down with something.  

~ caring hubby ~ so thankful for hubby who did his best to take care of me by running for things like orange juice, wor won ton soup (our go to when we don't feel great) and prescriptions

~ understanding dayhome parents ~  not just that they understood that I needed to take sick days (you'd be amazed how many don't), but that a couple of them even mentioned to me that in all the time they've been with me they've noticed that I've never taken a day for being sick.  That was a blessing to me knowing that someone noticed and cared enough to let me know that.  

~ helpful and caring agency and consultants ~ so thankful for the agency I am registered with and  the caring individuals who run it.  From my consultant to the director to the accounting administrator, they were all helpful in everything I needed from taking my txts and phone calls on a Sunday to subbing to answering my questions as to what to do when I have to take sick days.  I know it's all extra work for them when someone calls in sick and I'm grateful they were so kind

~ fun tv ~ I was happy to find a show to watch while laid up in the arm chair.  I was so sick I couldn't even focus on reading.  But my sis told me about her favorite sitcom now on a streaming service.  I am not a sitcom liker in the least and usually don't find them funny and mostly crossing lines, but I am enjoying this one, so far.  Pretty clean content with only minimal swearing.  I binge watched the first season.  Nice to have something to take my mind off not feeling well.  

Well hope you are all healthy and feeling well.  What were your blessings this week?

Friday's Fave Five #877

Well, welcome to a frigid Friday's Fave Five.  We've been plunged into the deep freeze this week with a big winter storm on Tuesday.  The storm is over but the cold stayed behind.   I finally get to use my winter FFF button.  But bad weather doesn't stop us from taking of note of blessings in our lives.  So if we don't like the weather where you are let's direct our focus to the good things God has brough out way this week.  

- Valentine's date ~ usually Hubby and I don't go out on Valentine's Day because of the crazy busyness of restaurants on that day.  But this year our favorite steak restaurant was open on that day starting at 11:00 a.m. rather than just for supper service at 3 or 4 so we decided to go for a nice steak dinner.   There was only 2 reservations available for the whole day and wouldn't you know one was for the time we wanted.  Thank you, God!  We had a lovely steak meal and it was nice and relaxed and not nearly as crazy busy as it would have been at night.

~ sweet valentine's from the kids ~ Valentine's is always a fun day with the dayhome kids.  They're always so excited and  love to share the treats they brought for each other and for me.  I was blessed with not just a fun little card and little sweet treats but one family went above and beyond and got me a gift card to a local Mexican restaurant which just happens to be my favorite.  Appreciate the kids and their families in my dayhome.

- cozy blankets ~ this week the soft, cozy throw blankets have been much appreciated by me.  So nice to have when reading a book or watching tv while the wintery weather is blowing outside.

- pedicure with sister ~ my sis and I made a spur of the moment pedicure appointment.   After my Mom passed away we are are determined to spend some time doing enjoyable things together.  The last years of both my Dad's and my Mom's life it seemed that all our conversations and time together was serious and having to talk through and deal with all the things that come with  senior parents with health issues.  We wanted the fun part of our relationship to resurface.   It's been a blessing reconnecting to the fun side of us.   

~ puzzle finished ~ Well, we did it, Hubby and I finished the puzzle.  I have to say it was super intimidating at first but then the challenge was fun trying to find how all those crazy pieces fit together.  We only worked on it on  the weekends, so it took us 3 weekends to do.  Yes, the accomplishment felt great but it was a blessing giving us something to work on together rather than sitting watching tv.  

StumpCraft Wood Puzzles

What were you're favorite blessings from last week that you are thankful for?

Friday's Fave Five #876

Welcome back to Friday's Fave Five.  .  It's time to look back over our week,  no matter what it's been like, good or bad, and find five shining moments that blessed us.  Sometimes it super easy and the 5 slots fill up fast, and sometimes we have to search a little harder.  But I know one thing, doing this for so many years, is that if we develop a habit of intentionally looking on a regular basis, when the hard times come, it becomes our anchor.  The blessings though they may be more hidden are easier to recognize.  If you're new you can go to the link in the sidebar and get the guidelines and then just join right in!

~ helpful Hubby and little friends ~ last Sunday I did something to me knee that made walking hard and bending my knee very painful.  I debated hard about calling a sick day on Monday but Hubby said if I didn't want to do that he would work from home and be around to help if I needed it.  Parents were told that they would have to be on call if things went south and I couldn't safely provide care.  It was amazing how all my little dayhome friends tried to be helpful in their own ways.  I even had one of the older ones watching me from the corner of her eyes all day and when I would make a move to stand up she'd run over to try and help me up.  She even took my elbow one time when I was going from kitchen to living room and walked me like a little boy scout with a little old lady crossing the street.  It was all very endearing.  Needless to say they all got a little treat at the end of the day.

~ making progress on the puzzle ~  whew, it's a doozy.  With two of us, working it over two weekends this is how far we've gotten.  But it's been a fun activity to do together.  

~ surprise phone call ~ in the middle of the day the phone rang with a number I didn't recognize.  Now usually I don't answer these because 9 times of ten they are someone trying to sell me something but for some reason I did answer this one.  And I'm so glad I did as it was from an old friend of ours who we haven't had communication with for many, many years.  He was just sitting at home and thought of us and called.  It was nice to get caught up on where life has taken them.

~ homemade chicken noodle soup ~ again this week I find myself fighting off some sort of cold trying to take ahold.  My Mom would always make soup for us when we weren't well and I did the same for my kids.  But when I'm not well I don't always feel like putting in the effort even though I know I'd love it.  But this week I knew I had about 4 containers of homemade turkey vegetable broth in the freezer,  It was easy to just thaw one out, boil some peas and carrots and noodles and I had delicious comfort food to stave off the virus within 20 minutes.  So glad I had that in the freezer for just such an occasion.  

~ vacation days booked ~ I finally decided on my summer vacation days for the year.  One week is always the same every year but the other can vary from year to year depending on what we are doing.  For some reason it's always stressful for me to choose that second week but it's finally done.  It's a relief and gives me something to look forward to and plan for.  

Have a Happy Valentine's Day tomorrow but before you go, what were 5 of your favorite blessings this week?